Stewie’s evil turtle
So here’s the HD quality version of that really fun test footage from the Deadpool movie we are never going to get. Thanks Fox!
My typical school day
As a teacher, I wish one of my students would say this. I would die laughing and then remember I’m supposed to be the adult in the room.
WHY IS THIS TINY CHILD FUNNIER THAN ME
DAPHNE WHO THE FUCK U THINK U FOOLIN
fred finna tear it up in the basement
Sears executives be like “How can we say Thank you come again, but also sound like an incredibly aggressive ex-boyfriend?”
can you imagine though
you send your enemies a rather large amount of these in various sizes. you leave no return address or explanation. they open all the boxes to discover these wondrous pillows. they are reluctant to keep them but eventually they give in and integrate them into their home like the above pictures. after a few weeks or even months, theyve gotten accustomed to having them in their home and routinely relax in a large pile of the odd pillows. until one night you just take every single one back and replace them with actual rocks of the same dimensions so that when its time for them to relax and unwind from their day day fall into a pile of hard unmoving boulders. they break their spine and are paralyzed. you have won
What the fuck is wrong with you…
We need to all keep this in mind. We are all blessed to have made it this far, and we should be happy and thankful for that.
Eid Mubarak, people of Tumblr! Forgive me for any wrongdoings and I pray you all have a blessed day! Please remember to keep the less fortunate and those in difficulty in your prayers! :)
Rick Ross wearing a chain of himself wearing a chain of himself.
this is the level of flagrancy that I want to be on
me: what’s for dinner?
her: *spreads her legs*
so, did you not cook or ….. cause popeyes closes at 10 and i need to leave now if i’m gon make it.
when you see someone cute but they’re straight